AUSTIN, Texas — Pregnancy and childbirth are said to be some of the happiest moments in a mother's life.
But for some women - overwhelmingly Black women - it also comes with the fear of the unknown and a laundry list of complications.
"I will try to have another baby, I do not want to imagine what will happen if you would have a child without me, I don't think you will make it, but I told him to keep me," says Mother Joia McGowan.
Before the birth of her son, Josiah McGowan, in 2019, Joia McGowan sat down with her husband to have a conversation no one could imagine.
"I know someone who also passed away and the father panics and think baby, baby, baby and they don't think they will wind up losing their wife and they lose their wife," says McGowan.
With the risks at hand, McGowan always prioritize finding a doctor who understood her challenges.
That sense of security vanished during her third trimester due to insurance.
Now having to choose a different doctor, McGowan found herself constantly fighting for herself and the life growing inside her.
She shares, "I saw them three times at they said I think you should have it at 37 [weeks], I said you know what I think to want to wait I am not sure. At 35 she said I am writing a note saying you're going to have it. I said this would be my last visit with you. I am going somewhere else you can't make me have this baby."
Unfortunately, this is a reality many Black women in Texas face.
Fighting not to be a statistic as the maternal mortality rate in the state increases.
Nakeenya Wilson serves on the Texas Maternal Mortality Review Committee, its latest report revealed disparities still persist for non-Hispanic black women.
"I can't throw a rock and not hit someone in my circle who has had a bad experience or less than ideal outcome... We are twice as likely as our mothers to experience these mortalities and morbidities," says Wilson.
According to the report, Obstetric Hemorrhage was the leading cause of pregnancy-related deaths for all women in Texas.
However, back in 2019, they were fewer cases overall for Black women the rate of complications increased by nearly 10%.
"It is heartbreaking, to see in Black and white that everyone else improves except for you and now because we are in a state and country that has shifted in terms of reproductive. If you are a woman of childbearing age that become pregnant you now have the walls closing in on both sides," Wilson adds.
Wilson hopes the committee's continuous research will bring about permanent solutions and give Black women access to resources they need so they can advocate for themselves.
So, mothers like Joia McGowan can enjoy their pregnancy without fear of losing anyone.
For more information on the Maternal Mortality and Morbidity Review Committee.
You can visit their website here.